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How does that make you feel?

Posted on Mon Nov 21st, 2011 @ 1:47am by Ensign Tem Par

Mission: All Souls Descend. Season 2, Episode 6
Location: Mason's office

The chime to Mason's office was inconstant use. With the recent events on the station the public were in confusion and chaos. Distrust was high and fights between locals, still suspicious of others were constant. The Klingons seemed to be bearing the brunt of it, though as yet there were no reports of Klingons retaliating. It was probably only a matter of time.

The door rang once more.

Inside Commander Mason was feeling her shoulders tense and a headache pounding behind her closed eyes. She was fatigued and stressed, something that often did not affect her, but that dammed door and comm simply wouldn't remain still for a few blessed moments. In a quick reprieve she'd treated to her office and gulped down a strong coffee.
"Yes, come in," she called wishing bitterly the expectant person would simply leave her alone.

The figure who stepped through was not a member of the public or one of her security officers. Instead it was the Vulcan Ensign in the blue of the Psychology uniform.

"Greetings, Lt Commander. It seems I am paying you a number of house calls."

She groaned and placed a hand to her temple: "Counsellor Par I'm sorry I missed our appointment, as you can see I'm in quite a demand at the moment and have a mountain of paperwork to attend to."

Par waved away the apology, "I understand fully. In fact, I took the trouble of booking an hour meeting with your aide at the desk. I am pretty sure that will be the warning flashing on the PADD half buried to your right. I am early so you would have a chance to tell me you are way to busy and don't need any support. In which case you can have an hour break while you enjoy that coffee."

She shrugged, "Its gone cold anyway," starting to retrieve the flashing device Par had mentioned buried somewhere upon her desk. After a quick inspection she stopped and fixed Par with another studied glance. "Thank you for the concern counsellor, but I'm quite alright at the moment."

He used his practised smile, "Well, Kristina, it seems you are living a blessed life."

"Oh, I wouldn't say that," she said lowly returning her gaze downward again, if only for a moment before being struck with a passing thought, one that she hadn't really been able to shake all day.
"Actually counsellor, this can wait. Please take a seat there's something new I want to discuss."

Tem raised an eyebrow. He expected to have to work much harder to get through Krissy's formidable wall. He took a seat opposite her and asked, "Indeed? What is it you would like to discuss?"

Mason wiggled in her seat uncomfortably. "I've been having dream, hallucination perhaps, call them what you will... and each time I see him... I see Zeek or can feel his presence..."

Tem nodded slowly making a note, "This would be Zeek Aerelon, your former crew member?"

The manner in which is spoke of Zeek with such coldness unsettled Mason further. She wanted to reach across the desk and punch counsellor Par square in the face. Therefore it took restraint and much clenching of her jaw to remain seated and answer the question without a hasty come back.
"Yes," she responded simply.

Tem studied Mason for a while, "I am going to make a judgement call on this one, Kristina, because I know you are a blunt person and appreciate honesty over Diplomacy. Zeek and you were romantically involved at one point weren't you?"

The word sounded foreign coming from Par's lips and painted an obtuse picture in Mason's mind. Although she was exceptional close to Zeek on a personal level and despite her own misgivings, past trauma and demons she wanted to explore a future with him. One that she'd certainly never imagined before he entered her life in such an attention seeking manner. That being said they never actually made a definite move toward one another save for a close proximity and unexpected kiss to seal a sweetened deal. It was hardly what she'd call romantic. "I wouldn't go as far as saying that."

"At the very least he was someone you felt you might be able to get close to, to trust. This is not something that comes easily to you. He represented a safety that you could not find elsewhere?"

With increasingly difficulties Mason struggled to hold the piercing eye of the counsellor sitting before her and now wished dearly she'd stayed silent since his soul searching was stirring tender memories.
"Yes, he does... did."

"Is it so surprising then, that while you are under such great and direct stress your unconscious mind seeks out and manufactures that safety for itself?"

With a sigh and heavy expel of air Mason sat back in her seat feeling exhausted by the taxing examination Par was conducting. It all sounded so feasible and, well logical frankly. But despite this methodical approach and method of thinking to her it didn't quite fit.

She leaned forward once more, resting her elbows and lower arms upon the desk top; "Look," she said turning at last to look the Vulcan in the eye. "I know where you're going with this and you're wrong. I didn't imagine him and nor have I felt this before save for the events that followed directly after his passing. I swear on my oath as a Starfleet officer I actually saw him and I'm certain if I were close enough I'd would have been able to touch him. Maybe I am going crazy, it would certainly delight some to hear me say that, and maybe I'm not - right now I don't have the time to going AWOL I've got several investigations to oversee and a smuggler to apprehend. I just thought you'd like to add this to your notes in hope you could prescribe something to keep me from derailing myself."

Tem nodded, making another note, "I do not believe you are crazy, Kristina. Nor do I doubt the possibility that you have seen Zeek. This Universe is full of strange events. I believe the Zeke you knew went to an alternate time line, I see no reason to believe that this, at least, may have happened here."

I am not a Psychiatrist, so I cannot prescribe you any drugs, though I can write a recommendation that you can talk to the CMO. You are a brave woman to mention this, especially since you prefer to deal with things on your own. Before I write the script, let me ask you two things."

Mason felt braced herself at the prospect of being quizzed in depth.

"What does it mean for you, if this is Zeek?"

"I - I don't really know," came the honest answer having not thought about this before now.

"If, as you assert, it is Zeek, do you want to make contact with him?"

The normally stern Commander sat back once more and weighed up the question against her personal feelings. "No," she said at length. "The Zeek I knew, respected and admired is gone... if this a alternate version of him then I don't want to know - for all I know he could be nothing like my Zeek..." My Zeek, where did that come from?
"I want to remember him as he was, not some shady mirror."

Tem nodded, "What if the Zeek tries to make contact with you? What if he has feelings for 'his' Kristina that he wishes to pursue? Will you allow it or is it best to avoid him and hope he does the same?"

Another question that the Commander hadn't considered. This was becoming complicated and behind her weary eyes she could feel the on set of headache building. "I think we'll cross the bridge when we arrive at it," Mason sighed fingering her cold, abandoned coffee cup.

Tem rose to leave, sensing the conversation had reached an end, "I will say it again, Kristina, you live a blessed life. You have picked a fight with a Major alien power and walked away with a slap on the wrist. You lead open rebellion against your ship's captain and helped lead a raid against a Federation Starbase. You have lived through attack by Borg, Gorn, Species 8472, and Tholians. Now you have a chance to get closer over an old and dear friend suddenly taken away. If I were prone to such fancies, I would say the universe likes you."

She smiled faintly at the comment: "Yet, I couldn't disagree more."

 

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