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Introspection

Posted on Wed Aug 19th, 2009 @ 1:28am by Chief Warrant Officer Akina Jrez

Mission: Seraphim Requiem: Season 1, Episode 2.
Location: Environmental Control Room

Thalal sat with her knees draw to her chest while they waited. While she sat, she watched Jrez. She did not know what to make of the Trill. He seemed genuinely interested in her but every time she made a move toward him, he backed away.
Maybe it was that he felt a sense of responsibility towards all the Explorers and didn’t want to be seen to be playing favourites; maybe he was just shy and unsure of himself. She’d have thought a joined Trill, with all those memories and experiences to draw on, would have no problems with shyness but maybe it wasn’t so. Of course, not every Trill was like the notorious Curzon Dax but even so….
In a way, she could understand his reticence. She was not normally one for shipboard romances. They could be fraught with drama: they could be split up at a moment’s notice by Starfleet re-posting one party or the other; trouble was bound to ensue if one or the other – or both – fretted about the safety of the other; the enforced proximity of so many other people made privacy difficult…. The list of potential pitfalls went on.
Added to that, she was acutely aware that further sexual complications clouded the picture. Her being Andorian had proven a stumbling block before. She had responsibilities to her bondmates. She was only one quarter of the bonding ritual known as shelthreth but reproduction could not go ahead without her. Prospective lovers baulked at a concept they did not understand. The thought of one rival could be offputting enough but three…!
If Jrez felt any such misgivings he’d given no sign but how was she to know what was going on inside his head?
On a brighter note, the days aboard the Alamein had been wonderful – the Borg incursion notwithstanding. She’d had no opportunity for any time alone with Jrez but they’d still spent time in each other’s company. Conversation had never really risen above her relating tales from her time in the Andorian Imperial Guard and he from his merchant activities. He could be very funny when he chose to be, when he felt at ease and his guard was down. Yet every time she tried to get a little closer – both physically and socially – the walls came up again. It was all so frustrating.
All of which left Thalal in a quandary. Maybe she should give up now and walk away before she got hurt but…something about him intrigued her. He carried none of the usual Starfleet baggage: he gave respect where respect was earnt, not just because of the uniform someone wore; he took note of regulations but was prepared to ignore or sidestep them if the need arose; he treated his subordinates fairly and was willing to be a supportive voice for them to the senior officers. She liked that about him but there was more…something indefinable, something she could not quite put her finger on.
No, if they managed to get out of here she’d give it one more concerted try before she gave up on him. She owed herself that much, at least.

 

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